I guess there are seven stages of grief. It appears as though I’m lurking around stage one– disbelief, shock, denial. 

Seems accurate.

I’m slowly trickling through disbelief– I can feel it. I can feel my body resisting it. I can feel my body shuddering through fear– my abdomen is stiff, my hands are shaky, my eyes are swelling. I am physically aching for some balance between this hollowness and heaviness.